


revolutionary desires of infinity - Fic

by orphan_account



Category: Shoujo Kakumei Utena | Revolutionary Girl Utena
Genre: Crack, Deliberate Badfic, F/M, Food, Freudian Elements, Nonnies Made Me Do It, Sex in a Car
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-19
Updated: 2014-09-19
Packaged: 2018-02-17 23:43:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2327462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>touga iz hawt butt hez a playboy. butt a meeting wit a badazz poptart changez all tat. bazed off a hawt artwurrk! :))) r/r!!!111!1</p>
            </blockquote>





	revolutionary desires of infinity - Fic

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [revolutionary desires of infinity](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2320754) by Anonymous. 



> hay guiz dis iz my first fic (adn itz also my first utina fic!!!11!1) adn i havnt finishde watchin da sereez yet so plz go easy on me. TOUGA IZ DA BEZT!!!!!11!11

ok so once upon a time there wuz a hawt sexty man named toga. butt hez gota very big problem; hez a playa!!1 he kist all da girrlz and mad em cry, juzt lyke Goergie Porgie. BUT ONE DAY TAT AL CHANGED 4EVA!!11!

1 day toga waz riding a red corvett, as redd as a redd redd roz. (GET IT? SYMBOLIZM!!1!1) butt sudenly he hit da brakez. lyng injurred on da rod wuz an innocent moe poptart! and not juzt any poptart. it wuz a poptart with pink sprinkle dot eyez and a smile lik 1 of doz japanesz sweetz commericialz! (A/n: if u lyk dis storee, reed mai meduka meguka fic were mumi tomo adn giga puddi gett 2gethr!!11!) butt da poptart waznt smilin now kuz it waz hurt and it begd toga for help. tuga thuht abut it and sad "ok as logn as u get layd wit me." "SUREEE!!!111!" da poptart sed. 'kuz whu wudnt want 2 hav3 sex with tuga!?

butt tugaz planz 2 brake h3r hart wer nut 2 b. sinc da day toga sav3d herr, da poptart vizited him evry day adn gav3 him gifz exprezzing her luff, includin an orfinn bby kitten namez likylik, juzt lik wut utina callrd herr prints in da manga!11!1 alzo kuz da kittin kept liccing da ppotart. anyway nanumi gott pzizzed off kuz da poptart wuz hangn out wit toga.

"u cant hav my bro hez mine!!11!" nanama yeld and slaped her in da face.  
"shut up hor insist iz illeegal" the pottart frownd, thedn she bloo her wistle and set da elefints aftr her and her crowniez.

1 day wen touuga adn da potpart were havin a piknik, he told da poptart all abut hiz tarajick pazt.

"mai dad rapped m3 as a kidd, adn now akeeo rapz m3 2 adn i hav 2 tak picz of him. datz y i sleep wit evry1 bekuz i beleev in freud and have low slef-worth"  
"o no datz terribl3!!!11" poptart cryed. "ima guna b a doolist adn beet up akio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111"  
"u cant do dat itz 2 dangeriss!" togua cried. "poptart, u showed m3 da lite and heeled my soul, i dont want u taken away from me!"  
"im sorry tuga butt in da name of otori i muzt set thingz rite. IMA GUNA B DA FIRZT POPTART 2 REVULUTINIZ3 DA WURLD!!111"

so she stol tugaz rozering and startd climbin up da starz 2 badazz crazzee muusic were akioo wuz waitng 4 her.

"HAHAHAHAHA U R TOO LAT3 POPTART!!!11!1" cakl3d akiioo. "I TOK TUGAZ VIRGINITEE AND NOWW ILL TAK3 URZ TO!!!1"  
"NOT SO FAST, AKIO! I GOTT DA POWR OF LUV BAI MAI SID!!1" razzberried da poptart. she pul3d da sord out off annthonyy kuz shez still a roze bribe 4 sum reezin.  
"IT'S TIME TO D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-DUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL!"

poptartz ross was ranebow wit pink sprinklz adn sh3 nott onlee tok out akeez rozz seh alzo stabbed him thru!!!!111

"congratz u won!" anthee clappd. "now i dun hav 2 sl33p wit mai bro anymor. itz icky adn insist iz illeegull! now ima gona sl33p wit utina ass much az i want"  
"utinaz hawt." ppotart winked.  
"hell yea sheh iz."

wen poptart told tuga teh gud newz he crid. so poptart carryed him bridal stile to da convertibl3 were they firzt met and mad3 luv too him wit a strap-on. it wuz da bezt sex tooga evr had adn h3 desided he nevr nedded 2 sl3p with any1 else again. "oh poptart ur so tart!" toga cried. da next day they gott married adn had poptart bbyz.

And nanana wuz stil beeng chazed by elefintz so she nevr bothrd any1 agin. (mitsuru marriied dat brown-hared chik i forgett da name of. pedofilia iz ileegill!!11!1)

**Author's Note:**

> so wutt du u think? shud i rit3 mor? i wana do a jury/mikey fic next!!!11 (FUK ROOKA!!11!1 HEZ IN DA WAY OF JUURI AND MIKIZ LUV!!) R/r plz no flamz!!11!11 VIVA LA REVOLUSHUN!!!!!!!!!!1111111


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